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What you need to know about surrogacy in NY and why you need to know it: Updated.

November 30, 2016 | By: | Filed under: Birth Certificates, Birth Orders, Egg Donation, Gestational Carrier Arrangements, New York Reproductive Law, Parentage Orders, Personal Musings, Pre-Birth Orders, Reproductive Law, Surrogacy, Surrogacy in New York, Third-Party Assisted Reproduction, Uncompensated Surrogacy

The other day  I had the privilege of visiting clients who had just come home from the hospital with their newborn.  It was a compassionate surrogacy and it was time for everyone to sign papers either terminating parental rights or seeking to establish them.  It was a unique situation – and one that brought tears to me eyes repeatedly while I was there (okay so I am a Crier and I am Proud of it).  In this case a grandmother had carried her grandchild for her daughter and son-in-law.  The emotion (and tears) behind this child’s birth is the subject of another blog.   The conversation we had while everyone was signing their papers and I was furiously stamping everything with my notary stamp is, however, the subject of this blog.  We were talking about how they got started on this monumental journey and a blog I wrote about Beyoncé and NY surrogacy.   In that blog, I gave an overview of some aspects of surrogacy laws as they pertain to New York State.  Having reviewed that blog, it occurs to me an update or clarification might be warranted.  If nothing else, I have changed how I practice and establish parental rights and my blogs should reflect that change, yes?  I have posted other blogs on surrogacy which discuss NY laws so this blog should be read in conjunction with the Beyoncé post from 2012 and my other blogs related to surrogacy.

Despite the estimable efforts of some of my colleagues to get NY to update our legislation, we still can’t do the paid surrogacy thing in NY.  In order to enter into a surrogacy arrangement in NY a friend or family member has to carry the baby for you out of her love and affection for you.  This is called “compassionate surrogacy” and it is indeed, a compassionate act for someone to carry another person’s child without financial remuneration.  If you don’t have someone who is willing to carry your baby out of their love and affection for you, you have to go to another state which permits compensated surrogacy.  You shouldn’t have too hard a time finding a surrogacy friendly state as NY is among only a couple of states which have “surrogacy unfriendly” laws.  And by the way, when I say “unfriendly” I would like to remind you that entering into a contract for surrogacy in NY, or facilitating a compensated surrogacy arrangement in NY, are not just acts which are against the public policy of the State of NY, they are potentially criminal acts.  Yes, let’s insert the word felony in there for some greater clarity.  Fun times.

But we have compassionate surrogacy and NY’ers can even have a traditional surrogate carry a baby out of her love and affection for the intended parents (traditional surrogates use their own eggs to achieve a pregnancy and a lot of states do not permit traditional surrogacy).  There are real options for achieving a family when you are medically or socially infertile and live in NY.  Provided you have someone willing to carry that baby without compensation (get the theme here?).

So let’s say you have someone willing to carry your baby for you.  Let’s now assume you have or can create embryos using your eggs and your husband’s sperm (I will discuss what happens when you can’t).  You hire an experienced reproductive lawyer to draft a document prior to the transfer of your embryo to the surrogate’s [compassionate] uterus which outlines your (the intended parents’) intent and the surrogate’s intent (and her husband if she has one), that she will carry your baby out of her love and affection for you, and that she has no intent to parent the child.  In this document outlining your intent, your reproductive lawyer also will address the laws of the State of New York and who will be deemed a parent, and at what point in time they will be deemed a parent, or you will be deemed to be the parent (dang that’s a lot of deems).   And that is as far as I go with my discussion of this document evidencing pre-conception intent, as the document itself will vary among the reproductive lawyers you may hire (and whose surrogacy practice is, by law, limited almost exclusively to compassionate surrogacy).

This Completes Step 1 = You now have a pre-conception document outlining the everyone’s intent for the compassionate surrogate to carry baby for the intended parents, and for the intended parents to be the parents.  Many reproductive lawyers in NY call this document a Memorandum of Understanding (or MOU for short).

Then your surrogate gets pregnant from the embryo created using your egg and your husband’s sperm (or from donor gametes).  What happens now?  Again this will vary based on individual attorneys but typically during the pregnancy, if your surrogate is married her husband can take steps to terminate any parental rights NY law will assume he has by virtue of the fact that he is married to your surrogate at the time your child is conceived and born.  In this case, typically the surrogate’s husband isn’t listed on the first birth certificate; it will be issued with just her name on it (attorneys do things different ways so do discuss this part of the process with your own attorney).  If your surrogate isn’t married, then bio dad’s name can be placed on the first birth certificate with the surrogate’s name.  This makes life a lot simpler for everyone, but this can only happen when your surrogate is not married.  However, it is only AFTER your baby is born that your surrogate can take steps to terminate her parental rights.  NY will deem your compassionate surrogate to be your child’s mother, notwithstanding the lack of any genetic connection to your child (well except for the grandmother who just delivered her grandchild and who, of course, is genetically related to the baby she carried).  Indeed, because she cannot terminate her parental rights until after your baby is born, under the current NY laws, your surrogate’s name will have to go on the first birth certificate issued for your baby by the State or City of New York.

After the baby is born you can go to court and seek an order declaring you and your husband (if your surrogate is married) to be the genetic and legal parents of your child.  This is often called a “post-birth order” of parentage.  Once you have that court order, NY or NYC will issue a new birth certificate with your names on it.  (Please see my discussion of Queen Bee regarding whether or not that first birth certificate gets sealed).  I have been having quite a bit of success recently getting post-birth orders quickly.  It used to be that I had to go into different courts – now I usually just go into one court and have a hearing to establish the intended parents’ parental rights and terminate the surrogate’s presumptive parental rights.  I have had hearings that lasted a total of 10 minutes.  Anti-climactic to say the least.

Now, to be fair, some of my colleagues go into court before the baby is born to start the process of establishing and terminating parental rights.  Everyone has their own way of doing things, but the bottom line is that whether I go into court before or after your baby is born, or both before and after your baby is born, your surrogate’s parental rights cannot be terminated and your parental rights cannot be established until after the baby is born.  That is until the NY legislature decides to move into the 21st Century with the rest of us.

If you have to use donor egg, donor sperm, or your surrogate uses her own egg, the non-biological parent cannot get a post-birth order in NY.  In this case, where someone else provided gametes (egg or sperm), a step-parent or second-parent adoption must be conducted to establish the non-bio parent’s parental rights.   The bottom line is that in NY, if you lack a genetic connection to your child, you will need to enter into some kind of an adoption process to be named mom or dad on that birth certificate.

This Completes Step 2 = establishing and terminating parental rights either through court proceedings which are completed after the baby is born and/or through adoption proceedings (depending on who has a genetic relationship to the baby).   

And at some point thereafter you will receive a new birth certificate with your names on it!

 

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The Top Ten Things Reproductive Lawyers Can Help You With

February 10, 2016 | By: | Filed under: anonymous sperm donation, Birth Certificates, Birth Orders, Current Affairs, Egg Donation, Embryo Disposition, Embryos, Family Building Law, Frozen Embryos, Gestational Carrier, Gestational Carrier Arrangements, In the News, infertility in the media, Infertility on Television, Insurance for Infertility, IVF, known sperm donation, New York Reproductive Law, Parentage Orders, Personal Musings, Pre-Birth Orders, Reproductive Law, Reproductive Lawyers, Same Sex Parenting and Reproductive Law, Surrogacy, Surrogacy in New York, The Journey to Parenthood, Thinking Out Loud, Third-Party Assisted Reproduction, Uncategorized, Uncompensated Surrogacy

Sometimes when I tell people what I do for a living they look at me like I have two heads.

Reproductive Lawyer?  What’s that???

Part One

In this day and age when celebs like Sofia Vergara and her Ex are all over the news fighting over which one of them is going to get to use their frozen embryos, I am really surprised that so many people have no idea what it is that reproductive lawyers do.  Or more to the point, why reproductive lawyers are not only helpful, but often play a critical and essential role for individuals and couples building their family through third-party assisted reproductive arrangements like surrogacy, egg, sperm, and embryo donation.

So what is it that we do for our clients?  How is it that we play such an important but poorly understood role in the formation of our modern families?  Here, in no particular order, is an overview of the top ten things reproductive lawyers can help you with as you begin to build your family through third-party assisted reproduction.  Now these may not be humor-worthy of top ten list legend David Letterman, but for anyone going through third-party assisted reproduction or considering it, this is an important list:

(1)  Reviewing your agreement with your surrogacy or egg donation agency (sometimes called a service agreement):  If things go south with your relationship with the agency this is the document that is going to be your agency’s safety net and the document you will look to in order to seek a refund of all or some of the money you paid.  Shouldn’t you know your rights and the agency’s obligations and responsibilities before you sign an agreement and work with the agency?

(2) Reviewing your surrogates insurance policy:  What if it doesn’t cover a surrogacy pregnancy?  What options do you have to avoid a potentially catastrophic financial liability?

(3) Preparing contracts for you:  Egg, sperm, and embryo donation agreements (anonymous or known), and gestational surrogacy agreements are all critical documents in protecting your family in the future and protecting you and your donor/surrogate during the IVF process and/or pregnancy.  Understanding the role this agreement plays in third-party assisted reproduction and the necessity for having them drafted is far too often overlooked.  How do you make sure your sperm donor is really a donor and not something more (like a parent)?  When does your egg donor relinquish parental rights?  What happens if she changes her mind about donating? How and when can you use any leftover frozen eggs or preembryos?  What happens if you and your surrogate disagree over something really important like selectively reducing the pregnancy?

(4) Using boilerplate contracts with your agency, or contracts you find on the internet:  Do they really protect you and what issues might arise if you use one?  Did you know that you are probably violating copyright laws by using one?  Did you know you cannot be forced or compelled to use an agreement provided by an agency and that you have the right to use an independent lawyer?

(5)  Entering into a known sperm donation agreement (with a friend or a Starbucks Sperm Donor):  What do you need to know about these sometimes very dicey situations?  What makes them so risky and how can you avoid those risks?  What can you do to protect yourself whether you are the intended parent or the sperm donor?  How can you protect yourself from a known sperm donor asserting parental rights or an intended parent trying to impose parental rights, custody or child support obligations?  Does a sperm donor need to be worried about the State asserting a claim that he has child support obligations?  Good intentions aside, everyone thinking about this form of family building is (in my humble opinion — IMHO) a fool for not consulting with an attorney before entering into this type of family building arrangement.

 

These are just a few of the important ways reproductive lawyers can help you through the obstacle course of third-party assisted reproduction.  We want to help you make smart future-thinking decisions and ensure that everyone has their rights protected as they intend them to be and as they move forward through this process.

Up Next in Part 2 We Explore:

(6)  Planning for Divorce or Death.

(7)  Managing money in a surrogacy arrangement.

(8)  Doing a home insemination:

(9) Getting your birth certificate:

(10) Understanding the impact of changing reproductive laws:

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Successful Surrogacy in New York: Myth or Reality?

March 5, 2015 | By: | Filed under: New York Reproductive Law, Surrogacy

Successful Surrogacy in New York

Myth or Reality?

 Most people think surrogacy is illegal in New York. This is true, in part; but it’s not completely true. I have tried demystifying this topic, but confusion remains despite my best, and repeated efforts.  So let’s try again because there are a lot of people in New York State who need to use a surrogate to build their family and they should know the scoop on surrogacy.  And there are a lot of women interested in carrying a baby for another couple or parent, who would like to be a gestational carrier or surrogate but don’t know what rights they have under NY law (please note I use the terms surrogate and gestational carrier interchangeably except where otherwise noted).

There is no doubt that we, as New Yorkers seeking to build a family and we, as New Yorkers in the family building business, are at a HUGE disadvantage when compared to states like Connecticut and California, or Illinois or Massachusetts where surrogacy is legal and perhaps even governed by statute. But that doesn’t mean we don’t have options. As a prospective or intended parent you can enter into a gestational surrogacy relationship, you just need to know when and how you can do it. As a lawyer or doctor, you can certainly help people have babies through surrogacy, you just need to know what aspects of your role in this family building process are legally proscribed or permissible. (This blog addresses only those aspects of family building through surrogacy for prospective or intended parents or gestational surrogates.)

The three biggest myths surrounding surrogacy in NY are:

Myth Number 1: Surrogacy always is illegal in New York

Myth Number 2: Traditional Surrogacy is illegal in New York

Myth Number 3:  NY will not recognize a surrogacy relationship entered into in another state.

 This blog will debunk the first myth that surrogacy always is illegal in New York.  Subsequent blogs will address traditional surrogacy, another type of surrogacy where the surrogate uses her own egg to help conceive a baby for prospective parents, and what happens when NY courts get involved in enforcing or recognizing gestational carrier arrangements made in other states.

So back to our first myth.  Only certain types of surrogacy are illegal in New York, not all surrogacy. As a NY resident and intended parent you:

(1)  cannot pay another NY resident to carry a child for you; and/or

(2) enter into a contract for that NY resident to carry that baby deliver in NY.

Any contract for a compensated gestational carrier/surrogate who resides in the State of NY and will deliver in the State of NY violates NY law.  The contract itself is illegal and unenforceable and the compensation is illegal.  Drafting the contract and matching the prospective parents with the surrogate also happen to be illegal but that gets us more into the work that attorneys and doctors perform with relation to gestational surrogacy.

A NY prospective parent,  however, can enter into a contract to have someone outside of NY carry a baby for them; and they may compensate that gestational carrier (provided of course she lives and will deliver in a surrogacy friendly state–more on this in a moment). So let’s break it down to what is illegal:

            Paying a gestational carrier in NY to carry and deliver a baby in NY.

            Entering into a contract to pay the gestational carrier in NY to carry and deliver the baby in NY.

      I have oversimplified this a bit, but I think you get the essential points.

No contract, no payment.

Prohibitions aside, if you are a NY intended parent and need to use a surrogate, or you are interested in becoming a gestational surrogate you have very doable options:

You can have a friend or family member act as a gestational carrier for you, or you can carry a baby for a friend or family member, as long as there is no compensation.  This is called “compassionate surrogacy”.  Strange as it may seem, this happens more frequently than you would think and more women are willing to help their friends and family members by acting as “compassionate gestational carriers” than you might expect.  If you are a prospective parent, don’t write-off this option just because you can’t think of anyone who would do this for you.  You might be surprised to find out that your sister-in-law or best friend from college would be willing to carry a baby for you, and expect or want nothing in return.  Some things to conisder about compassionate surrogacy:  Of important note, you cannot have a contract in this type of relationship, but you do need legal documents prepared before the baby is conceived which explain the process and the laws of the State of New York as they apply to compassionate surrogacy.  This legal document, albeit not an enforceable contract, will discuss the parties’ intent to conceive a child through third-party assisted reproduction, explain how the intended parents’ parental rights will be established and when the surrogate’s parental rights (and her husband if she’s married) will be terminated as she will be deemed the child’s birth and legal parent at the time of birth (as will her husband), and how and when a birth certificate will be issued with both intended parents names (assuming there are two intended parents – it could of course just be a single prospective parent).  That’s a quick summary of compassionate surrogacy and NY.

You also can look for gestational carriers in surrogacy friendly states – outside of New York.  In those states you can compensate the gestational carrier (it usually is easier to find a gestational carrier who will be compensated than one who will do this out of love and affection and without compensation), and enter into a binding, enforceable contract. In many of these states you can get a pre-birth order that identifies the prospective or intended parents as the legal parents from birth and relieving (for lack of a better word) the surrogate of any parental rights or obligations she does not want to have.  Other states permit you to obtain a post-birth order that identifies the intended parents as the legal parents for purposes of the issuance of a birth certificate with their names on it. Sometimes, a non-genetic parent (for example, when an egg donor was used, or for same-sex couples where one parent may not be genetically related to the baby) may have to enter into a step-parent adoption when they get back to NY, but that isn’t a huge burden if you have found a wonderful surrogate.

There is no doubt that the laws as they pertain to surrogacy both in and outside of NY are complicated and can be overwhelming, but that doesn’t mean you can’t do this. It is simply a question of who will carry your baby. If you have a friend or family member who is a NY resident and who wants to carry a baby for you, as long as you don’t pay them money to carry the baby it is legal to enter into surrogacy arrangement. If you don’t have a friend or family member willing to carry on a compassionate (uncompensated) basis, then you need to go outside the borders of NY and find a surrogate whom you will compensate.

For more information on surrogacy-friendly states (NY is, of course, not considered surrogacy-friendly because you cannot compensate a gestational surrogate), and for more information on the laws of other states that might help you locate a surrogate check out this website:

http://creativefamilyconnections.com/surrogacy-law-by-state/

 

Nothing in this blog is intended to, nor shall it be considered legal advice.  Nothing herein shall be deemed to create an attorney-client relationship.  The contents of this blog are for informational purposes only.

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