Homework Assignment No. 1: The Infertility Survival Handbook, Knitting and Opening Your Heart
July 23, 2009 | By: Liz
I have to admit that I have been struggling to come up with a homework assignment for everyone, and for myself. I have my real homework to do from my coach, regular client work, drafting my eBook series (yes, I really am working on that!) and my new project (announcement very soon) . . . so finding time to figure out an assignment hasn’t been easy. Fortunately, someone else gave me the inspiration.
I am a knitter. We all know that. Anyone who read the Infertility Survival Handbook Knows that throughout my infertility and adoption journey I was knitting my little man’s lovey blanket. I couldn’t always knit, sometimes it was too painful, but I do believe that knitting that blanket opened my heart bit by bit to the possibility of motherhood. No, to the PROBABILITY of motherhood. I read knitting magazines now for fun, and I have about a half a dozen projects in the works. My very special clients usually get a hand knit baby gift about two years after their baby is born or comes home. It turns out, however, I am not the only knitter who went through infertility. Now what are the odds of that? In the current issue of Knit Simple Magazine, the “last stitch” (an article at the back of the magazine) is written by a former attorney now author of knitting books. In her article, entitled Happy Endings, she discusses how she knitted throughout her infertility and pregnancies. I showed my DH the article and he asked me: “you think she read your book?” It sure sounded like maybe she had, and if she hadn’t, we had definitely travelled similar paths. She too feels that her knitting opened her heart to motherhood and gave her a vision and hope for her future which included children.
Now I am not suggesting we all start a knitting or crochet project. But there are many things we can do, crafty or not, that tell the Universe (the All-That-Is, God, Allah, Buddha) that we are visualizing our family, making a space in our home and our hearts for our family. I don’t care what your favorite thing is, but your first assignment is to pick a project — any kind of project — and start working on it. You could knit a baby blanket, a baby layette, crochet a baby afghan, knit a baby hat, needlpoint a nursery rhyme, paint a picture, create a scrapbook of your infertility journey, paint the nursery walls, write and frame a letter to your baby, start an adoption diary. The only rules are it has to be related to putting infertility behind you and focusing on life on the other side, life with child. Make, create something for that baby or child.
And keep a pad of paper next to you. This is for homework assignment number 2. As you work on your project write down any thoughts that come up, good or bad, related to the baby, the experience, the needles, the paperwork for your adoption. If you feel like it’s all a joke and a waste of time, WRITE THAT DOWN. If you feel suddenly free, and excited, WRITE THAT DOWN. As you work, write little bits and pieces of the thoughts that pass through your consciousness. We’ll talk about them next time.
Happy Creating a New Life everyone!
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